Just another fairy tale
I know when I speak out my feelings you literally feel ki mai pagal hu, mjh me dimag nai h, mai sanki hu. But you never thought ki mai esi kyu hu.
I still hope that at some point of my life I'll find some who'll understand me. Understand me through the deepest layer of my heart.
It doesn't matter if that 'some point' arrives when I'll be some 80 years old because then at least I could die at peace thinking that I had someone who understood me and didn't think that I'm a crazy emotional crap.
I don't know why I'm writing this or why am I even sobbing while typing. I don't know whether this is depression or obsession or just grief of not having achieved what I wanted to.
All I want is to be happy.
But people don't let me because people judge me. People judge everyone, I am no special case. But I don't know why this affects me so much.
I try to hide my feelings, my emotions, my ambitions, my plans behind my laughter and untimely, unreasonable anger because I fear, I fear that people will mock at me, make a laughing stock out of me for being a soft, sentimental girl.