My wife's sexual past is bothering me.

Since 2012, I'm in love with a friend of mine. She had a boyfriend in college. But I was ok with that. I didn't confess my love to her as I was struggling with my career that time. She also loved me that time (I later came to know that from a mutual friend). I was busy with my studies and didn't contacted her frequently.

I proposed her in 2015 and she accepted. She told me that a friend of her has asked her for marriage but he couldn't convince his parents so it didn't work out.
Later in June 2016, I found some disturbing pics of them in her phone. I was shattered because she hid each and every thing about it from me. She had shared bed with him multiple times but didn't had sex. I asked her if this was all she had. She said yes. I forgave her.

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We got married a few months back and now I found some videos and Sk**e chats that proves she was lying. I asked her about it and she said she hid it because she didn't want to lose me.
Now I have a sexual image that is disturbing every now and then. I can't trust her fully. Though she loves me a lot and is faithful to me now but I can't let go of all this from my mind and it's making my life a hell.

I'm so disturbed that I can't focus on anything. I don't know how to tackle with all this.

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prince 2 years ago

I can understand what you are feeling. It mainly happens when you have been too perfect in your past and expect your girl to be same. All here will be giving u piece of words. But, what I say is, Whenever u think abt her past, first accept it. Start to think about beautiful moments u had with her. Both of u sit together and u explain ur situation. A true girl will support u rather than defending herself. If she is supportive to u, like trying to help u out of that, then, u r very lucky to get her.

reply 2 years ago

In the past, you weren't a matter of subject. But now you are. If presently she's having sex with other guys that would be cheating. But her past is her business. Be a man and respect her.


Dj 2 years ago

Its not abt respecting her past choices, its about getting to know something more everytime when she says there is nothing more to tell. Its a feeling like 'breach of trust'.


Nandy 2 years ago

Don't keep on digging the past u will be looser.


TS 2 years ago

I know its difficult to accept the past especially when that some person trying to hide and we have no idea about that but what can we do love is pure and true so juz forget everything start a new life and take a promise that she won't repeat it anymore stay happy


Nlpianveenesh 2 years ago

Dear, Are you in love with her or its just a lust. If you are in love accepte her as she is. I hope you have loved her soul not her vanishing skin beauty. Yes it's distribing fact, which can't be changed. Visit a good NLP master he/she can imprint you with new memory.


Rashi 2 years ago

Find out something that she does for you..maybe sonething as simple as make your tiffin..remind yourself those things each time you go into that zone..see what all she does for you that she never did with that guy..n another angle is that..someone else wanted to marry your wife too..but he won her! Be happy you get to be with her!


Anonim 2 years ago

We should not leave someone could of some past. What matters the most is present. If u 2 are happy and she is faithful to u then y r u making ur life complex?? Just love her and be with her and don't let it ruin ur life


Tuta hua ashiq 2 years ago

Brother it was very difficult for a girl to forget her first love and the one from whom she was physically connected But u have to except her past and move forward Talk to her that that u trust her U have to trust her But once she break your trust then u know what u have to do


a 2 years ago

past doesnt matter man...present does... just think clearly and open ur mind


vipin 2 years ago

U need to see professional psychiatrist to overcome this issue because u might be overthinking about it which can lead you to depression. so take control of things before they go way out of your hand.


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